Is It Okay To Take a Break From a Relationship?

First of all, I wrote this article in 2018, but due to certain circumstances I could not update it.

Taking a Break from a relationship and Breaking up are entirely different from each other. Individuals once in a while take breaks seeing someone on the grounds that the relationship isn’t going admirably, or in light of the fact that one of the gatherings has turned out to be impractically intrigued by another person. Further, a break is frequently restricted to a predefined timeframe—two weeks or multi-month, for instance. When the two gatherings in the current relationship consent to, or acknowledge, a break and determine its span, the desire is that each will head out to give the relationship some genuine idea, to consider whether they can change things or whether the relationship should end. Sometimes relationship reaches to a Painstaking point when taking break becomes neccesary.

 

A break isn’t a separation: It’s a respite from the other individual—a period to think without being around the other individual amid the reasoning time frame. Since a break isn’t a separation, it is anything but a stage that changes the central standards of the relationship: If the relationship had been elite, or monogamous, at that point despite everything it is selective amid the break.

 

Otherwise, a break would simply be a separation.

 

 

During a break, none of the standards of the relationship change, then again, actually you don’t see the other individual for the endless supply of time. Every individual inspires their opportunity to consider whether the relationship should proceed—yet they don’t go out to try things out and see whether there are better fish in the ocean. They don’t cheat, and they don’t manipulate the other individual by spreading terrible bits of gossip about them. They treat them as their progressing sentimental join forces except for having insignificant contact with them. However, when the break is over, the couple should get together and talk about whether they can spare the relationship. On the off chance that they can, the relationship proceeds. If not, a genuine separation may occur. Be that as it may, this last period of taking a seat to examine the relationship—regardless of whether on FaceTime, through Skype, or face to face—is an essential advance before things can proceed onward and before the relationship can either proceed or stop to be. Until the point when two or three makes that stride, the key principles stay set up.

Although sometimes taking a break in a relationship ends up in a break up but sometimes it is effective too. Offer yourself and your accomplice the chance to let your heart(s) become fonder. Ever miss the sentiment of really missing your other half? A feeling great worth returning to, that is without a doubt!

 

 

 

Recently, I was out with a lawyer friend of mind for coffee, she is senior than me. She recently, last year divorced her husband. She told me that now that her husband is gone she misses’ him. I felt bad for her because may be she rushed, they rushed. This made me think of taking a break, rather than breaking up. It is not that I was not happy, I was but….. I guess I loved or I love the workaholic-self more than the normal self of mine. Let’s see.

 

 

Here I asked some people, bloggers and friends that do they think if it is good to take a break or is it better to end the relationship right away, this is what they said.

 

Daisy blue Zac: I would say that it is EASIER if you take a break…. most of the times you realise that you are better off alone but at the same time your partner is waiting for you if you realise that you still want to be with him.

BUT it can happen that the partner doesn’t want to wait for you…. so when you tell him that you want a break, he breaks up with you. You have to be prepared for that.

 

 

Benjamin Austin: Well it depends, when you are not really sure of how it might affect your life nor your plans and career “yes” you could take a break and think about it well and how you can fit it into your life, but if is someone that is ready to accept you and support you and ready to flow with you I’d say no need taking a break instead build up your lives together because both of you are moving towards the same direction.

 

 

Amayz Zing: Taking a break from relationship is not easy it takes a lot of hurt or pain however if you decide to break your someone it means you already for the consequences

 

Kavri Iyer: If taking a break from a relationship scares you, that is not even a healthy relationship in first place.

 

Daeyna Jackson: I’ve never been in a relationship where people take breaks but I have heard of it. From experience, when a guy tells you he wants a break that means he already knows that he doesn’t want you.

Taking a break means nothing because if you are serious about the relationship then you will stay and work through the difficult times together

Taking a break is just preparing to break up permanently.

 

Frank Cherry: If I were in a relationship for example and my girl wanted a break. It’s done. I ain’t coming back

 

Subhobroto Chattaraj: Definitely. I don’t believe carrying on with a relationship for the sake of it. I believe if things are not working out it is better to take a break, and come out of it. Just to take a impersonal look at it, and ask what am I getting out of it. During these time spans, I completely focus on myself and not the person anymore. Whenever I have taken a break, and then went on with another relationship, things were better. I didn’t act the same way, didn’t make the same mistakes, and understood the other person better.

 

Karen Monica: To me it’s ok to take a break especially if the relationship has problems. By taking a break you get some time away to reflect on your feelings for your partner

 

Sneha Chatterjee: Nope rather be together and talk it out I mean it will be awkward but in the end ur partner n u will understand each other better and then take decision taking into consideration that ur partner is who he is and he won’t change and will u be able to uk stay with that. And break just creates more fights I feel.

 

Dalene Ekirapa: think it’s so okay to take a break from a relationship. You can always take a breather, be away from each other, explore the world and get back together if you feel like you can still work things out. They say that distance makes the heart grow fonder so I’ll back it up. But in case you don’t feel like getting back together, well and good. Then you can take a break for good and call it quits.

 

David Elliott: I think a lot depends on your relationship, your commitment to it, and the stage of the relationship.  Early on probably no way.   Also depends on your reasons for taking a break.  Like if you were going off to college or had something which would take you away for a few months or more, it might be ok to take a break.  Better to take a breather before establishing a commitment.  I’ve seen it work even after being in a committed relationship but it’s the exception and not the norm.

 

Shashi: I don’t think there should be a break in relationship… If there is a problem then talk and solve it.. if u can’t solve it then it’s better to end that relationship.. Personally I don’t think there should be break and again after sometime couple should be together

 

Alexandra cook: You must always consider what is best for you as an individual. If you feel a break is necessary, you should respect your feelings. It is better to have a break and make a decision, as opposed to sticking with something that doesn’t feel right for the sake of being in a relationship.

 

Tausif Khan: There’s no such thing as taking a ‘break’ from a relationship. If a relationship needs a break then it’s not a relationship at all. But yeah there’s a space in a relationship where each companion can be in his or her own zone and spend some ‘mee’ time.

 

 

I guess, different people have different views on the topic of break in a relationship. I guess we should always think the pros and cons when anything comes with relationship.

 

 

 

 

Picture Courtesy:

 

Photo by Yaoqi LAI

Photo by Joshua Earle

 

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Author: Moni

A caffeinated Workaholic ✌

102 Replies to “Is It Okay To Take a Break From a Relationship?”

    1. SAME!

      In all seriousness, I guess I don’t really believe in breaks. Maybe I’m black and white when it comes to that. It’s one thing to cool down, but a break just seems more final.

      1. I agree with Tausif. Wanting a break means there’s a breakdown in the relationship already. It means you haven’t been clear about your needs and boundaries. It would be heartbreaking to have my partner ask for a break. I’d never trust them with my feelings after that.

  1. I believe breaks taken at the right time can be healthy. Due to my husband’s job he was away quite a bit, but I found this time away made us miss each other & focus on ourselves before we reunited.

    1. I feel like breaks are great for when two people who get along well are finding themselves at a crossroads in their personal lives that makes them need to reassess their futures.

      It’s good in those situations to get temporarily out of your current situation to have better clarity on what you personally want, and whether you need to go it alone.

      Like, if a big potential career change is underway, and it doesn’t fit with you and your partner’s original plan. Taking a break can help in that situation to figure out which life is of more value to you, and if there are or are not ways to make both work.

      It regards to big relational problems, though….I think it’s usually better to either work it out together or completely move on. If things aren’t working, i don’t believe space is often needed to be able to see that.

  2. I have always said that taking a break is breaking up. But I feel with marriage it is totally different. Marriage is not easy and for some people, it is easier to run away than actually deal with the issues. I know I need space from my husband sometimes. Usually, I go upstairs and watch Hulu or Netflix until I have calmed down. Never do I want to take a break from my husband though. It is neat to see other people’s opinions though when it comes to something like this.

  3. I think it is hard to qualify what is a break since it depends on the relationship. I had friends who were on a break that never finished while others who ended it fairly soon after it started. As far as I am concerned, taking a break is the first step to breaking up.

    1. I think it depends on the person because there are some relationships that flourish from taking breaks. I have never done it but my friend has.

  4. Taking a break in a relationship means either the relationship is not working or there is a problem. If someone told me that he is taking a break from our relationship, that would be the end of it! It can never be okay for me.

  5. As much as every person is an individual, every relationship is also different. What works for one might not work for another. But if you decide as a couple that’s the best course of action, it could be a saving grace for the relationship.

    (Sorry just thought I should let you know – when you are typing a comment you can’t see it because it types as a dark grey on black. I have to highlight the comment to see what I’ve written, haha!)

  6. I don’t know if relationship breaks work. I think that if there is something wrong in a relationship, both parties should communicate and try to solve the issue. By taking time apart things don’t get solved by themselves.

  7. I think taking a relationship break can be good if necessary but I don’t see enough difference in that and separation. And I think it could open up the relationship to ending more easily. But regardless, we don’t live in a perfect world and sometimes you have to do what you have to do. Only each person knows what they need to do that is best for them. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

  8. Well, I also think taking a break translates to breaking up. I would rather plan a weekend trip, ensure my partner will be able to travel and then have a heart to heart talk during the trip. Communication is key

  9. This is a great perspective. Breaks are better than an abrupt ending. There is no problem to take a step back and analyze if it is worth the relationship to continue.

  10. Taking a time away from each other allows to reevaluate the connection between the two. It’s not about missing or not one another. It’s about feeling free and more creative when not in a committed relationship.

  11. I think it is okay to take a break from a relationship. I even believe it would be healthier for both parties, especially if monotony or boredom starts to set in. A few days alone to rethink, to recharge, would be good. If a break from the relationship would take a longer period of time, it would also be a test of a couple’s fidelity towards each other.

  12. I personally would think if I want a break from someone it’s either because things are being rushed or I feel overwhelmed. That doesn’t necessarily mean I want to end things. But if it’s for any other reason then it’s a break break!

  13. Personally, I have never been in a relationship where we felt the need to take a break. Either we’ve made the decision that it’s best to go our separate ways or, in the case of my husband, we stick it out and figure out how to make it work. That being said, I do have friends that have chosen to go that route in the past with mixed results – some ended up getting back together with their partner after while others realized in that time that they are better off apart.

  14. Lots of people take breaks from relationships and then rekindle their romance later. My husband and I did not get together until he KNEW 100000% that he was ready. It took him 30 years, and I think that’s great. I was patient with him and that’s what relationships are all about – patience!

  15. Taking a break from a relationship often feels like a breakup. Personally, I could never do it but I can see how it could be a healthy thing when one person needs time or space to be alone. It would also make someone reflect on whether they truly want the other person in their life.

  16. I believe a break is necessary sometimes. My husband and I took a break before we got married. It was then that I realized how much he meant to me.

  17. sometimes a relationship break can cause a relationship to get only stronger. a friend of mine and her bf broke up and got back together only to get engaged a few months later.

    fyi the ads are so big and it is so hard to see the comment i’m typing bc of the colors.

  18. I do not know. It is a problem in which I have never found myself, therefore I would not know how to express myself about it but I read your point of view with great pleasure and interest.

  19. From experience the idea of ‘taking a break’ has always come around because of my own fears about the relationship – I’ve been too afraid to call off something that I know isn’t working and ultimately a break won’t solve anything. However, everyone is different, and perhaps there are times when taking a break to evaluate life is a good thing, especially if you’ve been on top of each other a lot and need some time to think.

  20. For me, I think it is a good idea to “take a break” from the relationship. Spending time apart can “rekindle the flame.” Some couples need to spend time alone. My husband and I did take a break from each other, a few years ago, for a week. We found that it was an emotional awakening. It only proved that we cannot live without each other.

  21. I too have never really been in.a relationship in which I felt I needed a break. I think if I felt that way… I would just call it quits and move on. Thank you for sharing and appreciate the advice 🙂

  22. Taking a break from a relationship might help make the relationship stronger after the pause. I believe we all need some space and we could think clearly if we have the space we need.

  23. I agree with you completely, i think it is healthy to take a break from a relationship but it has to be done for all the right reasons and not to escape facing problems.

  24. It’s never an easy choice, but if you feel yourself fading in a relationship, it’s time to walk away. I do believe in fate though, and if it’s meant to be, many times you’ll back later to each other at a different point in time.

  25. There are definitely a lot of sides to this, pros and cons. I don’t think people ever really change much, so my thought is that you can’t expect someone to have changed much.

  26. Luikily my fiance and I have never had to go on a break but I do agree with you that there is a difference between the two.

  27. So I am going to play devil’s advocate and disagree with you with regards to taking a break. Don’t get me wrong, there are many valid points but to be honest, if you take a “break” or temporarily “separate” you are just wasting time. A new study from researchers at Ohio State University reveals that approximately 79 percent of married couples that separate end up getting divorced. 79%!!! SO why not just accept that fact that if you really feel like you need a break it is your mind, heart, or soul telling you to MOVE ON!
    Now if you feel trapped, stuck, or lost in a relationship, rather than pushing away from the issues, why not come together & go out and see if you can get help with counselling?

  28. Interesting topic to ponder on. Well I think, yes break is needed. It is needed to analyse your inner and outer self both. Whether the relation is worth, are you going strong or is it decreasing in is magnitude. But not for long. Too long a break may cause negative effects. It may lead to a permanent break which is not desirable. Being with your partner with whom you are in a relation has a lot of pros associated with it.

  29. I definitely think some couples benefits from breaks, but personally, all the breaks I’ve asked for have been excuses to break up with someone when it was just too hard to admit the relationship was over.

  30. great advice. i have taken breaks from relationships before and they have helped. it def depends on the relationship and the people involved.

  31. Taking a break is always needed in any of the forms. In India ladies prefer to go to their hometown in summer vacation. which is kind of taking a break only. It is good to be mentally fit.

  32. I personally do not believe in breaks. A break is a break up because two people, especially adults should be able to talk through relationships not always push each other away.

  33. Thinking about what I said then. I’m not sure if I feel exactly the same way. I know that it still depends on your reasons for doing the break from the relationship. Whether most relationships deal with the strain of the separation, I would guess they do not. I think you also have to be very specific about how you take the break. Your partner must no you just need to clear your head and aren’t considering breaking up.

  34. This is a very interesting article. I once had such a forced break in the relationship, when my boyfriend went abroad for foreign contracts. It was 6 months that gave us a little distance and further strengthened our relationship.

  35. To be honest, it’s totally okay. You can try again when you feel like it. It’s up to you if you want to or not but if you aren’t emotionally ready for a relationship then it’s best to take a break.

  36. really interesting topic, thankfully i havent had to deal with this as i could imagine it would be really hard to do

  37. They aren’t the same, but they do feel the same. I would be devastated if my boyfriend asked me to take a break from our relationship!

  38. I guess break could help in figuring out whether it should end in a break up or not. A break uo any way is not too great emotionally speaking. So a break can give some thinking space whether to go on or not. I also think if there is a need for a break…. things are not going well great anyway. There is no one size fits all! if you know what I mean.

  39. For any healthy relationship, a little break here and there works wonders. It lets us know the value of our partner. However, initially taking steps to talk about is a bit hard.

  40. Great article. I wonder, if your thoughts changed at all in the last two years, since you wrote this in 2018. Taking a break is a great option, in my opinion. That is, if there are merely annoyances and not abuse. Sometimes you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.

  41. In my opinion, taking breaks is unnecessary stress. Not seeing or talking to each other for indefinite period doesn’t seem like a healthy option to me. Why wouldn’t you want to talk it out instead of avoiding the person you love altogether? Seems kinda contradictory.

  42. For me own space and taking a break are two different words to describe. I have my own space and sometimes I m ok to give myself a break from all of my family or relationships it’s ok but I want to take a break from my relationship means there are some issues and that’s why I want to rethink about my relationship and henceforth I am taking a break. If people come to think about the relation or direct break it I guess taking a break is much appreciated than break it .

  43. Yes, I think people can and sometimes we don’t have to define a relationship so rigidly – just be positive and don’t let other’s negative energy affects you, – Knycx Journeying

  44. Wow I’am so glad that you share my advice on your blog. All I know is taking a break from relationship is the hardest part especially when you that person is really love but choosing yourself is always the best no matter what it is.

  45. I think this is a really interesting idea. I can see how a break could work. I mean, even if it leads to a breakup, it probably means that you were trying to hold onto a relationship that wouldn’t have worked anyway.

  46. When I hear taking a break, I too think of Ross and Rachel.

    In my experience, if someone wants to take a break, they want to break up. If you are spending too much time together, you can modify that — like if you have schoolwork or a work project that you have to focus on. YOu still stay in contact and remain monogamous. If you feel there are problems that require space, I figure you should discuss these with your partner. YOu should be able to work on your issues if you are meant to be.

    Otherwise, a break is a drawn-out break-up!

  47. Break ups are hard. Due to the fact that you have gotten used to being with a particular person. But yes, we do have to evaluate if the relationship is truly beneficial for both parties. And the break up in itself is an evaluation process as you have mentioned.

  48. I’m really glad you make this distinction. I think they are two different things. Communication is key to know which of these is occurring in your own relationship.

  49. I love your point about how a break is not a separation. Some of us think it is and make things harder on ourselves . Great post

  50. Really appreciate you writing about this topic. I’m currently on a break with my boyfriend, but I find that I made a mistake. Sometimes it’s good to figure out what you want when you take some time for yourself.

  51. If there is no point in continuing the relationship and leads to a toxic relationship, then it is best to break-up. Time can only heal relationships that are worth it.

  52. At the end of the day, it’s your life and you are responsible for protecting your psyche and your piece – so it is very acceptable to take a break from whatever you need for however you need. Might there be consequences, yes, but you take that on when you make that decision.

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